E-MAIL: eli @ popullus.net
RATING: PG-13
POSTED: Feb. 7, 2006
SUMMARY: Five kisses (more or less), not all of which were Earl's idea.
NOTES: Answer to the "five kisses" meme. All. Thea's. Fault.
DISCLAIMER: Read
Joy had always liked kissing. She liked fucking more (there really wasn't even a point in questioning that), but she was a good kisser, real good, and she never had been what anyone would call shy.
Watching her and Crabman go at it like those sucker eels they were always pulling off people's legs down at the lake, that was when Earl realized, "Hey, besides Karma, I haven't been getting any," and set about looking for any that might be interested in getting him.
~~
Kenny was the excitable type, and that was a little disturbing sometimes. (Randy was excitable, too, but he didn't tend to clap his hands so much. Or do the bouncing thing. Truthfully, there just wasn't all that much energy in Randy unless there was a dog with really sharp teeth involved.)
Earl didn't comprehend how excitable until the day he mentioned that he'd seen a sign for Mama Mia! coming to the next town over when he'd been out fetching chicken eggs and posts and fencing, and had been trying to think of someplace in driving distance that would have cow eggs.
When Kenny let go of Earl's head and went dancing around the room, Earl didn't run for the bathroom. That'd have been rude and unkind. He did chug every beer on the table, and then held up a hand and barked, "'Nother round!"
~~
Randy was out getting another package of powdered doughnuts, and Catalina was bent over tweezing floss and tissues out of the trash can, and Earl decided that was the time to ask, "Are you ever planning on kissing my brother?"
Catalina let out a noise that, if Earl had been less of a charitable guy, he'd have called a snort. A loud one. Then she straightened and put both hands on her hips to give him that look that all women knew how to give, and that Earl had learned a long time ago was more automatic than personal. "Are you ever planning on letting your brother ask for himself?" she sneered.
Earl blinked at her. "Well, if that's what you're waiting for..." He let that trail off and shrugged. "Randy's more likely to just fall on you, especially if he trips."
Her sneer softened into a smile, and then a laugh, but not a mean one. Earl grinned back, because he could picture Randy falling flat into her face and that was a funny picture.
Shaking her head, Catalina tucked her trash can under her arm and headed for her cart. Earl stepped out of the doorway so she could get by and he could get in for his car keys, and she stopped, went up on her toes, and planted one right on his cheek.
When Randy said, "Your face is red," Earl just said, "Fell down."
~~
Around kiss seventy-three, Earl was thinking about chapstick. Plain wax, black cherry, lemon chocolate zinger, didn't much matter.
Around kiss two hundred and five, it started to get dark, and Susan came over smiling sunshine bright to tell him the fair had brought in more people and money than even her granddaddy's fair back in 1962.
Earl tried not to whimper in gratitude when she only hugged him tight enough to press deep into the bruises he'd gotten from Mrs. Jasper.
~~
She was staring at him. Wide, wide blue eyes; pouty lips that must've been what people called rosebud lips, they were so red and perfect; skin softer than that velour stuff Joy made a blanket out of one time, and that skin was pure white and pink, not (Salvation) Army green.
She didn't blink. She was starting to freak Earl out.
"Hold her against your chest, not out there like you're trying to choke her or something."
Afraid to take his eyes off her (oh my god, what if she started moving?), Earl tried to say without moving his lips, "Why?"
"So you don't drop her, doofus," Joy snapped, but Cathy just laughed and walked over.
"That, and also because that's how you hold babies. Tried and true method," she said, and pushed lightly, and Earl suddenly was afraid to drop little Tara Lane, so he pulled her in closer and what do you know, the world didn't end.
She was still staring at him, though.
Then a hand came up and Earl's head twitched back, automatic (not scared, not really), but the hand still batted at his mouth over and over. It didn't hurt or anything, but...
"Why's she doin' that?"
Cathy laughed again. "She likes kisses," she said.
Earl took his eyes off Tara just long enough to freak out some in Tara's mom's direction. "What?"
"Jumpin' Jesus," Joy moaned. "Earl, shut up and kiss the girl."
So he did.
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